lately, the theme of my life seems to be trying to hear God and then looking for that peaceful feeling in my stomach that allows me to choose a path and stick to it.
today, i was reminded of this same theme as i read a psalm, "The Lord says, 'I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.'"
today is my first day starting a new job in college station for a furniture company. in this position i will be the social media and blogging assistant/overseerer/person. i'm excited about this unconventional approach to the job i thought i would have at this point. hoping beyond hope that this is the correct path for me.
i'm getting to the place in life that i don't just want to survive and provide for myself and dean doing the best job i can find. i long to hear Jesus tell me the best pathway for my life, and in choosing so go on the grandest most fulfilling adventure that could quite possibly only provide beans, rice, and thrift clothing for a season.
either way. rich, poor, or somewhere in-between, i am grateful and blessed. and i'm trying to listen to see if i 100% heard correctly.
if anyone has any experiences of how they have heard God in the past, or advice on how to listen, i'm all ears!
thanks for reading, and happy last monday in october.
27.10.14
11.10.14
life without gravity
i found myself sitting on my parent's front porch today. i was kissed by a cool breeze that blew in during the early morning, painting the sky with brilliant blue clouds and perfect light rain drops. today, this is not where i hoped i would be.
not because i don't wish i could be close to my family and spend time with them (duh); this is a season i have been thankful for. but because life isn't the way i pictured it would be and i'm kicking myself over it. i know i haven't touched this blog in some time but my heart feels a tremendous desire to be real. to live authentic in a world coated in filters, perfect moments, and great angles.
my discouragement stems from what seems to be an endless job search in college station as i attempt to live and earn enough money to survive in a place that isn't hours away from Dean. it's almost humorous how many jobs i've applied for, how few interviews i have had, and how even those didn't pan out. but this isn't about me grumbling. i want to declare that even when i make plans, and they don't go the way i wish more than anything that they would, i can be brave because there is a greater purpose than my comfort.
multiple people have told me over the course of this week that, seeing how hard my attempts at getting a job have been, God must have something special in store and that he wants to place me in the perfect place. it's an interesting thought that i know is spot on because it keeps coming up.
to be steady in a world where there is no stability. to continue on in a dark tunnel, knowing that there will be a light at the end of it. whatever the struggle, i know my God is faithful and will keep me in all seasons.
"For I have given rest to the weary and joy to the sorrowing."
i just wanted to be another voice today. but this one being honest and saying my life isn't perfect. being engaged isn't that magic moment that sets the world straight but that in all seasons there is enough wiggle room to choose joy and walk in peace. that's where i'm shifting my prospective today.
not because i don't wish i could be close to my family and spend time with them (duh); this is a season i have been thankful for. but because life isn't the way i pictured it would be and i'm kicking myself over it. i know i haven't touched this blog in some time but my heart feels a tremendous desire to be real. to live authentic in a world coated in filters, perfect moments, and great angles.
my discouragement stems from what seems to be an endless job search in college station as i attempt to live and earn enough money to survive in a place that isn't hours away from Dean. it's almost humorous how many jobs i've applied for, how few interviews i have had, and how even those didn't pan out. but this isn't about me grumbling. i want to declare that even when i make plans, and they don't go the way i wish more than anything that they would, i can be brave because there is a greater purpose than my comfort.
multiple people have told me over the course of this week that, seeing how hard my attempts at getting a job have been, God must have something special in store and that he wants to place me in the perfect place. it's an interesting thought that i know is spot on because it keeps coming up.
to be steady in a world where there is no stability. to continue on in a dark tunnel, knowing that there will be a light at the end of it. whatever the struggle, i know my God is faithful and will keep me in all seasons.
"For I have given rest to the weary and joy to the sorrowing."
i just wanted to be another voice today. but this one being honest and saying my life isn't perfect. being engaged isn't that magic moment that sets the world straight but that in all seasons there is enough wiggle room to choose joy and walk in peace. that's where i'm shifting my prospective today.
22.2.14
another blogger at another coffee shop
normally the reason i stop blogging is because i've waited so long between posts.... is anyone else like that out there? it could be keeping up with anything: journaling, tv series, working out, eating right, cleaning your room, relationships, etc.
i think that i start to take on false ideals that i'm just not a writer because i haven't written... haha that is actually a pretty good argument but definitely not the point i'm trying to make.
words.
as a case manager at an adoption agency all i do is write. write. read. sign paperwork. and write some more. after a week of this work the last thing i feel like doing is sitting in front of my macbook typing. this makes me want to purge myself of all things electronic and writing.
i day dream all week of spending every ounce of free time i have rolling in the grass and building mud pies and playing in the sun. away from a desk, away from a scanner, away from a keyboard.
alas, writing for myself again. i'm going to do it. i'm promising myself that i will go back to that quiet place and write the story that's been on my heart for so long.
the point.
the desires of our hearts (though clouded by to do lists, age, crying children, paying the bills, and jobs that don't pay overtime) are still waiting to burst through the emails, phone calls, and the must-does to take their rightful place in our lives.
divinely placed desires are meant to change the world. the dreams and desires you carry are simply that. yours.
don't change. don't stop listening to what you want to do because chances are, the very thing you want to do will change the world you live in.
i think that i start to take on false ideals that i'm just not a writer because i haven't written... haha that is actually a pretty good argument but definitely not the point i'm trying to make.
words.
as a case manager at an adoption agency all i do is write. write. read. sign paperwork. and write some more. after a week of this work the last thing i feel like doing is sitting in front of my macbook typing. this makes me want to purge myself of all things electronic and writing.
i day dream all week of spending every ounce of free time i have rolling in the grass and building mud pies and playing in the sun. away from a desk, away from a scanner, away from a keyboard.
office.junkies.in.their.once.native.habitat
alas, writing for myself again. i'm going to do it. i'm promising myself that i will go back to that quiet place and write the story that's been on my heart for so long.
the point.
the desires of our hearts (though clouded by to do lists, age, crying children, paying the bills, and jobs that don't pay overtime) are still waiting to burst through the emails, phone calls, and the must-does to take their rightful place in our lives.
divinely placed desires are meant to change the world. the dreams and desires you carry are simply that. yours.
don't change. don't stop listening to what you want to do because chances are, the very thing you want to do will change the world you live in.
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